A non-consensual sexual act (assault or abuse) violates more than a person’s physical security; it is an attack on their autonomy and an abuse of power and trust. The process of recovering from this trauma, therefore, often takes much longer than the time it takes for any physical harm sustained during the assault or abuse to heal. Bruising on a person’s skin will disappear much faster than a bruise on their very sense of self, their diminished capacity to trust, or the debilitating effects of post-traumatic stress.
Regaining autonomy and reestablishing control over their lives are powerful actions survivors can work towards as they repair the harm they have suffered. Survivors frequently express that they feel very much alone after experiencing sexual violence. But, there are many people and services ready and willing to stand with them and offer support as survivors choose their own path forward.
In this blog post, I outline the rights of survivors of sexual violence and explain some of the support they can access as they exercise those rights.
Consent must be clear, understood, and un-coerced.
You have the right to consent to any and all sexual activity and the right to withdraw that consent at any time during sexual activity.
Consent to engage in sexual activity must be given freely, established each time there is a sexual encounter, confirmed when other sexual acts are about to begin during a sexual encounter and can be withdrawn at any time. If there is any ambiguity about whether a person is giving consent, it should always be confirmed or reaffirmed.
There are also situations where consent cannot be given, even if a person appears to agree to sexual activity. For example, these could include situations where a person is (or feels) threatened, intimidated, manipulated, tricked, or unconscious, or asleep.
Consent is absent when:
- someone uses authority or perceived authority to compel another person to engage in sexual activity;
- someone uses physical force or threats of physical force;
- someone is intoxicated to the point where they do not have the capacity to consent; someone has an intellectual disability/mental health condition which prevents them from making an informed decision or fully understanding the possible results of sexual activity;
- someone is under the age of 16 (unless they consent to participate in sexual activity with someone close in age according to law and consent is otherwise freely obtained);
- someone is under the age of 18 and the other consenting party is in a position of trust, or authority or there is a dependency on that person, or if it is an exploitative activity (for example, pornography, sex work/prostitution).
The perpetrator of sexual abuse or a sexual assault, especially if they are known to the survivor, might try to convince them that natural bodily functions and reactions that may occur during sexual activity mean they must have liked what was happening or wanted this activity to continue and therefore provided consent. This is not true. Consent must be made clear through words and/or conduct prior to and during sexual activity. If consent is absent or if a person continues to make unwanted sexual contact after consent has been revoked, it is a form of sexual violence.
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